Pills

THIS IS AN OLD BLOG ENTRY DATED 2008 AND ME BEING A BUM

I woke up late in the morning at about 10:30 am. I popped some pills to make me feel good- some Ibuprofen and Vitamin E, and oh yeah, that slimming pill that I’ve been taking since last November. Pills are supposed to make you feel better and some should make you look good. However, most pills disappoint you and worst, rob you. The slimming pills that I’ve been taking are expensive and I still weigh like a mother whale. I should be the one to blame anyway because I found the box catchy. The words written behind the box were promising, like a marriage vow or something, yet the lying pill failed me. Dear Pill, I believe you.

If you think that the slimming pill deceived me, wait until you hear the story of the Vitamin E. This pill is extremely expensive. I should take it everyday and pop another to put it on my face but since crisis is severely hitting the world, I would rather take necessities or vices like beer or cigarettes.

Last week, when I was drinking with friends, Jam, a pregnant drinking buddy of mine told me that my skin, particularly my face, looked smooth and like a L’oreal ad or something, luminescent. I told her about the pill. When I got home, I realized that I haven’t been taking Vitamin E for two weeks already. Now it hit me. It’s not the Vitamin E that’s miraculously working on my now younger skin. It’s the new regimen that I’ve been doing for the last five months.

My Regimen:

• Sleep at least 8 hours a day.
• Drink plenty of water especially after you woke up.
• Go out only at night.
• Don’t go to polluted areas.
• Don’t take a bath regularly.
• Drink alcohol at least once a week.

Explanation:

The secret is I don’t go to work.

1. Whether I sleep late or not, I make it sure that I get at least 8 hours of sleep even if I wake up so very late.

2. Since one of my leisure is alcohol, I tend to be very thirsty in the morning and was able to drink a pitcher of cold water in one go.

3. Ivory’s schedule changed to morning shift so the party always starts at night. I also have this concept na hindi ako tuyo para magpakabilad sa initan ng araw, haleeeer!

4. On slack days, I locked myself inside the house. The polluted air coming from the vehicles don’t affect my pores since I don’t go to work. Evening travels are much better as well since it is less polluted.

5. When I was still working, I remember blogging about how I love Sundays. Sundays means rebel day. And rebel day means not taking a bath. And now that everyday seems like always a rebel day, I don’t take a bath regularly especially if I don’t feel like to. The good thing about it is that the natural moisture from the skin stays in your body, making you looked younger and supple.

6. Lastly, maybe the alcohol has something to do about it. Maybe the germs are being sanitized like how a rubbing alcohol does to a wound, but this one is a lot better, because it works on the inside like Vitamin E.

Conclusion:

I therefore conclude that Vitamin E is expensive and that if you’re going to be more resourceful, you’ll find other ways of making your skin healthier. I also found out that while this is a mere fact about Vitamin E, there are also a lot of positive side effects about it. Vitamin E oftentimes helps a relationship. Since this pill makes you horny, it gives you a chance to patch things up with a lover, even for a short period of time. It also calm the nerves and stimulates the mind, you know what I mean.